2013 damn face

the truth is  2013 come . well that is me . edited . how good is life when we can edit it just like we want. but thats impssible . well i  just hope to get better in the next new year. happy new year everyone !





_music never sleep_

the face that keep me alive

love u!

happy birthday jesus

 so xmas confronting us.  like before , it give huge tide of happiness to all us ., sodamn me. but i only
wish santa will give me the "time" as my present .  well life goes on although it never went as we expect. too much drink , sing and laugh will just mend it for a while. super duper faked. such a shit pretend to be happy . i miss  a  lot of people .  to admit ,this xmas totally aint gonna be my best. even if it doesnt exist. god im sorry for giving such a damn expression on ur birthday , i know im just a person with nothing and never good in pray but i just hope u will understand me and taught me  the right thing to face this .  so it still look great right? well absolutely . even it doesnt even give a slice of mean to u but for me u already wound me enough .and the scar? yeah . hell pain .  anyway im still happy that i still live on this 2012 xmas to hold this feeling for u .

_ken_

end of world?

so people keep talking about the end of the world. for me. i already end long time ago i just started the new beginning of me. well , dont think u're right just the time didnt show it. it just we cant see with our eyes. the perfect fools always say 'see there is no end of world. thats all bullshit.' dont be so sure dude.. anyway i have no contact with god so i cant tell the right time about this end thing, but for sure , it will come for us someday. well sometimes human is the major factor this end thing come to confront us .. i mean that there is no apocalyps except we create it . but taking it deep inside it do exist inside of us. u can discover when the time tells the end of u not the world . so, it shows that the end of us is near then the end of the world.  if u're happy the world is not gonna end yet, be ready for ur end.

i feel totally gay

well , to be honest i am single . super boring and yeah its hell. i just don want it end the same as before. so yeah lets time fix it . i feel so gay. life? yeah gay life. avoiding for girl? it sux but i just need it. saw a holding hand , smile laugh and mostly the sweet talk uh kiling me.oh man . stay late night share story , the holding hand , kisses (wish i ever had) i miss them all . so im gay ? almost. i  just wish a fangy girl that good in fingerstyle or in other word guitar come to me and say . "hey the word of the day is me. how about u come to my place and take the word." i just wish it ! but its ok . i still happy and breathe in this lack of romance life.

life

out of night that cover me, black as the pits from pole to pole
i thank whatever gods may be for my unconquerable soul.
in the fell clutch of circumstance, i have not winced nor cried aloud. under the bludgeonings of chance my head is bloody but unbowed. beyond this place of wrath and tears looms but the horror of the shade. And yet the menace of the years finds and shall find me unafraid. It matt

ers not how strait the gate how charged with punishments the scroll. I am the master of my fate and i am the captain of my soul. If u can keep your head when all about you are losing theirs and blaming it on you, if u can trust urself when all men doubt you , but make allowance for their doubting too. If u can wait and not be tired of waiting, or being lied about,dont deals in lies, or being hated,dont give way to hating and yet dont look too good, nor talk too wise. if u can dream and not make dreams ur master, if u can think and not make thought ur aim, if u can meet with triumph and disaster and treat those two imposters just the same. if u can bear to hear the truth you've spoken. twisted by knaves to make a trap for fools or watch the things u gave ur life to broken, and stoop and build them up with worn-out tools. if u can make one heap of all ur winnings and risk it on one turn of pitch-and-toss , and lose and start again at ur beginnings and never breathe a word about ur loss. if u can force ur heart and nerve and sinew to serve ur turn long after they are gone and so hold on when there is nothing in u except the will which says to them ; 'hold on!' . if u can talk with crowds and keep ur virtue . or walk with kings nor lose the common touch , if neither foes nor living friends can hurt u, if all men count with u, but none too much, if u can fill the unforgiving minute with sixty seconds worth
of distance run yours is the earth and everything thats in it. and which is more- you'll be a man .

ALL ABOUT SHIT HAPPEN

sumtimes life doesnt go as expected right? this will totally give shit to all who experienced it. well i think i am the one . i guarantee that when u were stabbed by a knife on ur back it will hurt less than see someone u trust asking totally about the damn scar of ur love one . i know this sounds bullshit but i dont care. cause i know how the shit feel . the feeling of longing , empty ,combine and create new damn loneliness. lol sound sux. but its reality . the person who inspired u , levelled up ur guts to be the one with her and finally he took all the kisses .i don really care about this shit but it really gave me a damn pain inside . so , ,maybe u should give all ur words before the time not allowed u too . but sumtimes we must take it . cause that how we can learn to give away in our life . so yeah . let her or him go . maybe they were not meant for u . 

well to give it directly , we cannot push all things to happen according to our plan but sumtimes we must know the different between defeated and take defeat. defeated is u're struggling , striving and fighting but in the end u still down on ur knee to the ground. take defeat is simple that is to hold the title loser before the whistle blow up. so whatever is it , sumtimes we must accept defeat in our life because defeat is not evil its just let us to know about our weakness.

zz

out of thinking.

to think , u're still inside !

so life goin on? why not? but i feel that im stuck . i cant breath. the memory holds me tight .i should throw it away but cant . and to admit , a lot of smile had really shackled me. but i try to neglect. because. i dont need to say. people would laugh at loud reading this but i dont have an y intention to really care about it , i just say what i felt inside , i pictured it , every moment about it , now im paralyzed behind . i cant move on  can sum1 break the bond ?the ghost of you . condemned .it was me . the one who fool . the puzzle of the reality. a random scene toying me. the voice , the smile . completely devouring me.the distance increase. i cant hold it. just let it pass. since when u become the most friendly? u come every dream of mine .!!! go awayy. i cant loose the chain . damn . asking about having new hand-hold ? why not? it just you who kept pulling me from to do so .u haunt me . i want to feel free yet i will. i shall follow the truth . ignore the rest. keep climbing . and totally u will disappears. i am taking the best way to go through , hope and indeed it will work . i should say goodbye before . so should i say now?  if i were given a chance ,i just do hope that u will smile just like the way it become my greatest nightmare again .